Robert Priddy Writes Yet Another "Dream" Book

H.H. Swami Sin-Joy-Exposedananda



They say three is a charm! Robert Priddy wrote yet another "Dream" book. Critics are castigating Priddy for the uncreative, repetitive and apathetic names for his books. Rumor has it that Priddy is writing another book which will be aptly named "I have a dream" (that will plagiarize much of Martin Luther King Jr's works).

Hairy Baba! Bala Baba! ki jai!

Verbal Diarrhea Award

H.H. Swami Sin-Joy-Exposedananda



SAI TRIBUNE VERBAL DIARRHEA AWARD
The International Sai Tribune (world-reknown experts in verbal diarrhea) have chosen His Holiness Swami Sin-Joy Dadlani'nanda to receive the prestigious 2006 Sai Tribune Verbal Diarrhea Award! SaiByeBye, last years verbal diarrhea winner, gave a 5 hour speech before presenting the award. Swami Sin-Joy-Exposedananda, choked with emotion, cried for 5 minutes in his whisky glass, attempted to play his guitar and expressed homo-erotic feelings for SaiByeBye. The awards reception was concluded with the Martini Maha Mantra.

Hairy Baba! Bala Baba! ki jai!

Pizza Hut Miracle Picture

H.H. Swami Sin-Joy-Exposedananda



PIZZA HUT MIRACLE PHOTO!
Miracles never cease! Above is a Pizza Miracle Photo that clearly shows Sin-Joy-Exposedananda's face emerging from the pizza! After the Guru dispatched his devotees to a local Pizza Hut, to buy him a ham and broccoli pizza, the devotees congregated in the middle of the Restaurant and began chanting the Martini-Maha-Mantra "Hairy Baba, Bala Baba, Ki Jai". The Manager to the Pizza Hut tossed the devotees out onto the street for disturbing other patrons and that is when the miracle happened! Avatar Lookout Times obtained an exclusive interview with the Manager. Sipping a martini, the Manager said, "Yo no hablo inglés". Our translator interpreted this to mean "Yono Ono Hates English". However, the Taco Bell Chihuahua clarified that the correct translation, taken directly from the original Spanish, means, "I do not speak English". Spanglish Expert, Brian Steel, is currently being contacted for further clarification.

Hairy Baba! Bala Baba! ki jai!

Sin-Joy Cereal

H.H. Swami Sin-Joy-Exposedananda



NEW SIN-JOY DADLANI'NANDA CEREAL!
Due to the ever-increasing popularity of the S.L.I.M.E.S. movement, the new Pub Avatar, Sin-Joy Dadlani'nanda, has begun to market his own brand of cereal! Dadlani'nanda said, about the new marketing venture:

"This cereal is very high in fiber. Nutritionists have already established the heathful benefits of a diet rich in fiber. For those of us who suffer from hemorrhoids, this cereal is a blessing in disguise. It contains my own personal shaktipot. For those who are alcohol sensitive, the fermenting fiber in the intestine, from my cereal, will gradually acclimate the body to tolerate the pure blessings of my martini mix."

Hairy Baba! Bala Baba! ki jai!

AA Loses Ground To The Sin-Joy-Exposedananda Movement

H.H. Swami Sin-Joy-Exposedananda



Shortly after the announcement of the Pub Avatar, H.H. Swami Sin-Joy-Exposedananda, the membership to AA sharply declined (view graph above), rushing to join S.L.I.M.E.S. (Sin-joy's Liberation In Martini Enlightment Society) founded by the Sect's Leader. Arrack Schnapps (along with his wife Champagne and daughter Brandy) testified to the appeal of S.L.I.M.E.S. Arrack blurted:

"Alcohol breaks down inner barriers and allows one to express oneself as one truly is. Alcohol makes the ugly beautiful and the unholy sublime. It's true transformative powers are dangerous and can only be channeled through a Bona Fide Guru. Otherwise, one will end up wasted on the streets, transformed into such a low state. Remember, Jesus drank wine! The Sufi's described God as wine. In modern society, status is measured by expensive alcohol. Noah became intoxicated after the world-wide flood. Sin-Joy-Exposedananda is fulfilling ancient prophecy."

Hairy Baba! Bala Baba! ki jai!

Miracle Photo

H.H. Swami Sin-Joy-Exposedananda


MIRACLE PHOTO!
On the above photo, one can see how sacred martini olives are manifesting from Sin-Joy-Exposedananda's picture! It appears that an olive is emerging from the green light on his left hand. However, according to Maria (a worker at Quizno's) the green light is really guacamole from a Turkey & Guacamole sub-sandwich that Sin-Joy-Exposedananda ordered this morning.

Hairy Baba! Bala Baba! ki jai!

Burning Martini

H.H. Swami Sin-Joy-Exposedananda


Above is a rendering of the Burning Martini that Sin-Joy-Exposedananda beheld in samadhi, before his divine transmogrification. Sin-Joy-Exposedananda is said to bring up olive lingams every midnight that are ceremonially mixed with martinis and drunk as prasadam! The Guru has also enforced a strict dresscode that requires males to wear kilts and women to wear leather boots with 4 inch heels. Bertha McFlower, an 89 year old grandmother, didn't seem bothered by the dresscode.

"As soon as I drink Sin-Joy-Exposedanandaji's Martini Prasadam, with lingam olives, the pain from the blisters, corns and bunions on my feet is replaced with Ananda! I feel like a twirling dervish! Better than Dr. Scholls!"

Apparently, younger women refuse to join the sect. A woman (speaking on the condition of anonymity) told Avatar Lookout Times that she could drink better martinis with better looking men for free at the pub down the street.

Hairy Baba! Bala Baba! ki jai!

Emergence Of Pub Avatar

H.H. Swami Sin-Joy-Exposedananda


NEW PRESS RELEASE: January 12 2005: Avatar Lookout Times: The former Anti-Sai Activist, Sanjay Kishore Dadlani, was miraculously transformed into His Holiness Swami Sin-Joy-Exposedananda after working himself into a frenzy about Bala Sai Baba, the Sathya Sai Baba look-a-like. Those who witnessed the phenomenal event said that while the ex-devotee was drinking whisky out of a boot and talking about Bala Sai Baba, in a local UK pub, he passed out on the floor and his hair miraculously began to grow! The Guru's first words were, "Hairy Baba! Bala Baba! ki jai!"

When asked what he thought about his new Bala Sai Baba look, Sin-Joy-Exposedananda said he hoped to attract more women into his sect and hoped to reach numerous alcoholics with his new message of enlightenment through whisky and vodka! Sin-Joy-Exposedananda claimed, that before his amazing transformation, he saw God in the form of a Burning Martini and was commanded to help the drunks. Sin-Joy-Exposedananda stated:

"And the Burning Martini spoke to me and said, 'Go Ye forth and preach Mine Word. Tell Ye the hypocrites to first remove the beam out of their own eyes before they attempt to remove the Jim Beam (Bourbon Whiskey) out of other's hands!'"

Hairy Baba! Bala Baba! ki jai!